It's been exciting to share our news with people! Unexpectedly, a number of people that I tell at school immediately ask, "Oh, was it an accident?" One professor - PROFESSOR! - stopped me to find out if it was an 'oops'. (An oops? An oops is spilling a glass of orange juice, not mistakenly creating human life!)
I really wish people wouldn't ask me this question, because there is no tactful way to answer it. To say, "No, we were trying" immediately puts a mental picture in the person's head of my husband and I...well...'trying'. This is an image I don't want anyone in the world to have. Ever. Ever!
Because a 31-year-old married woman getting pregnant is hardly scandalous, my only conclusion is people think it's an accident because I haven't gotten my PhD yet. In academia, the only 'good' time to have a baby is right after you get tenure. Which will happen to me when I'm about 51 years old. But obviously I can't wait that long to have kids, because by then my mother-in-law would have killed me for not producing a grandchild!
My polite, well-mannered, quiet labmate came up with the best response to the question. "Just say to them, 'Yeah, the condom broke.'" At least that would end the conversation!
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Gee, there really are some clueless folks out there.
There actually are some tactful ways to respond to the utterly uncouth "accident" question. My personal favorite:
"It's too early to say. Ask me again around the 18th birthday."
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